Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Blogger's meet

The people I had convinced to come didn't show up - so I was in this totally new circle... and damn were they a bunch of serious bloggers. The meet was supposed to start at six but started a little earlier than that I suppose. Many revelations:
1) Met Scott, really interesting fellow (stashes camera in socks) who will begin to work for winksite from Monday
2)Discovered the possibilities of wordpress. This blog is moving to wordpress soon.
3) The conversation finally pushed me into opening my own flickr account, which I have been planning to do for a long time.

Topics under discussion were mostly innovative ways to connect with each other.

Have to get back to working for a management presentation tomorrow.

megaBLAH



That was what I slept under today. Was damn sleepy, came home late from Sheetal's place after "working" on a project, and then slept for less than two hours - before rushing to college, after forgetting the ppt. Almost got canned... everything amounted to nothing. Didn't attend the lectures, and roamed around looking for a place to sleep, almost wen't home, realised it wasn't practical, and ended up sleeping at Sion Fort.

Pretty peaceful actually... but there were sounds from the highway. Half-worked on a bunch of other projects after returning to college, came back home and waiting for the load shedding while watching two weeks notice. Pretty funny movie... watched it with a bunch of friends who have drifted apart now. Watched it the day the tenth boards ended.

Have to leave in an hour or so to get to the blogger's meet at Carter Road. Really short notice, everyone's invited, so if you live in Mumbai, rush like NOW to

CCD
Shop No. 14/15, Gagangiri Premises Building, Ground Floor, Carter Road Bandra West Mumbai-52
Mumbai, Mahārāshtra 400052
India


WINKsite has organized a get-together for
Bloggers in India. The meet is happening in Mumbai at Café Coffee Day.
Details of the event/venue/timings can be viewed on upcoming.org and eventful.com.

Monday, January 30, 2006

Stoooooooooooooopid project

I am at Goregaon, which is like REALLY far away from my house, have no clue when I am going to go back and the space bar on this keyboard is like screwed or something. Working on a project with Bhan and Balan (irresponsible bastard is not yet here) and we are still on the first slide of the ppt. Think the ppt is going to be killer... we have ideas that are going to sweep the class off its feet... totally innovative and new ways to present.
Some really cool shit coming up, but first I have to wake this stupid girl up and quit this blogging break.

Sunday, January 29, 2006

And now - cofee

I wonder if Cofee has a double f...
Took this psychological test (which was horribly wrong on many counts), and apparently my description for cofee was the same way I viewed sex. My description was 'unecessary' but that's like saying 4 million years of evolutionary inertia amounts to nothing.
My mom kept me off cofee for eighteen years so that I wouldn't get addicted. My first cup is in front of me, and I am going to blog as I drink it. I mean how many people do you see around who have had their first cup of cofee post childhood.

So here goes.

Hey good smell by the way, still have to sip it though.

So here goes... my umm... virginity

Hey its like cofee bite. Damn... eighteen years of absitnance amounted to NOTHING. Bloody, exactly like cofee bite.

Second sip: Some new weird taste - probably the taste of the caffeine or something.

Third sip: Ah well.. pretty much a let down. No energy boost or anything.

Rest of the cup: Actually... pretty nice. Might have it a few times.

Now that that's done, I guess I'll hit the sack. BTW, I have a video recording of my first sip. Now THAT'S something I am sure few could boast of.

disembodied



The grotesque rendering - as promsied. Nothing's wrong or anything, just in a 'shock people' mood after reading look back in anger.

BTW, Poser + Bryce + Photoshop. As usual.

Look back in anger

Read the play, angry as hell. Did it all in a span of two and a half hours, slightly distracted by Pathan's three wickets and the amazing Federer match. The play was irrelevent, didn't have a point - unless it like wanted to shock you or something, but I am in SIES BMM and I don't think I really have the capacity to be shocked anymore (unless Anurag comes alon and hands me a live wire).
Basically what happens is that there is this Jimmy person who has serios issues with his sexuality, himself, the world, his in-laws and his dick. His wife, Alison has serios issues with Jimmy's sexuality, Jimmy, and his dick. Jimmy spends his time bitching about the world and Alison's relatives. There is Cliff who just watches all the bitching and adore's Alison. There is Helena, Alison's friend, who packs Alison away to her in-laws because of all the abuse from Jimmy, BUT Helena has no issues with his dick, so they like come together. Totally fucked up play, but really cleverly written - only it should have been written with a non commercial purpose and a little more feel.
Total waste of time, but fuck that.

I lost a friend's wire, and roamed Thane searching for it. Apparently, Thane is out of stock of black USB cables, and she insisted on a black USB cable. Then since I had nothing better to do, I went around searching for friends to sit in their houses and bitch about the world and the sexualities of random people. But I was denied the opportunity because the said friends were elsewhere...

so I came home and blogged. Feel like rendering something now. Something weird, grotesque and disturbing. Will do that now.

Don't ask, won't tell

Rendered (many times over) in Bryce, Fx is photoshop, models from poser. The first one is a composite of at least eight various renders, clubbed together in photoshop.



Friday, January 27, 2006

Here again

Stupid cybercafe which smells like something I know, but can't really place it. I am replying to some mails about Pakistan instead of responsibly working on my project. But responsibly working on my project wouldn't amount to getting into the cybercafe ten minutes before closing time, defending Pakistani Soldiers, of all things, and to top it all, go ahead and blog about all of the above.

Think will work on the project now and follow the instructions:


Dear Customers,
If you want to take printouts
then COPY your files in
NETWORK NEIGHBOURHOOD
|
V
System 12
|
V
PRINT



Think I can hear my friends below... as irresponsible as me, but at least they aren't not bitching about Pakistani Soldiers... better hurry and meet them.

PS, something UBERSICK is happening here. Totally against the mood above, but just realised and it is freaking me out - don't wanna delete the text above - but this is so fucking perverted. In fact, I am fucking going to do something about it. This bastard is watching pornographic content, with his child - or some kid playing around. Damn people can be sick. Even if he is not upto doing something to the kid, watching such sites in his presence is disturbing... bastrard probably things children don't understand or get confused or whatever. Evil fucking asshole.

A truth hard to stomach

Let's first see exactly why smoking is bad. So it causes Oral cancer, lung cancer, bronchital cancer, cancer of the trachea, emphysema, and I am even going to go ahead and accept the little evidence for intestinal cancer. Then there is the degrading eye sight, premature aging, reduced fertility, pregnancy risks, damaged circulation, cardiac arrests, strokes, gangrene, smoker's cough and damaged skin. Let's just go all out and even accept nicotine-stains on fingers and teeth, damaged taste buds, damaged olfactory lobes, lack of energy, poor concentration, and... to stretch it a bit too much, amputation.
In fact, let's even look at the repercussions, children at health risk of asthma, cot-death, bronchitis and glue ear, spoilt clothes and furniture, and even increased risk of fire at home. Although these can be easily circumvented by smoking in designated areas, let's consider them anyway.

Consider that you are living in the twenty first century, (which you are) and in an urban area anywhere in the world, (Again, more likely than not, you are, because you are reading this). You are likely to work on a computer at office, go home and work on a PC, and carry around a mobile phone.

Now the radioactivity and the radiofrequencies emitted by your average mobile phone (if you must know, in the frequency range of 800-1800 Mhz) is carcinogenic too - it causes cancer - like nicotine or tobacco. Because of the thermal effect of the radioemissions on the body cells, the average temperature increases by as much as a degree, probably more. these radioemissions also cause apoptosis in cells - which basically means they do not die. This is not a cure for mortality, instead there is an accumulation of cells, and then there are tumors, treatment for which includes very harmful radiotherapy and chemotherapy - let alone the risks of paralysis and death due to the operations. Keeping cell phones in the pockets can lead to impotence - the gamete (sperm or ovum) count decreases with every phone call you receive while the phone is in your pocket. Also there is this disease known as the acoustic neuroma which affects your ear (only mobile phones, not landlines though).
If you are allowed to bring up amputation in the cigarette argument, I guess the skeletal and muscle disorders brought about by holding the phone in improper ways and overuse must be mentioned, along with the risk of accidents caused by talking on the phone and driving.
There are many more biological and genetic repercussions that are not as yet proved.
AND there is this risk of ignition at petrol pumps. (Don't get me on this one, the energy generated by a cellphone battery CANNOT generate a spark big enough to ignite a stray wisp of petrol, but the warning appears on phone boxes and petrol pumps, so I am going to fucking use it. In fact, what the hell, just to prove my point, I WON'T)

Wait till you see what happens because of computer use: Excessive typing on the keyboard can cause Repetitive stress injuries (RSI), which may not seem like a big deal, but it is very much like oral cancer not seeming like a big deal for a smoker. RSI is a permanent injury which affects the skeletal and nervous pathways in the hands - it strains the tendons of the fingers to the limit, and then some. Eye strain experienced by computer users was often related to screen illumination and screen glare. The damage to the eyes by the monitors include, apart from Eyestrain, Tired eyes, Irritation, Redness, Blurred vision and Double vision. The Carpel Tunnel Syndrome fucks up the neurons in the wrist area. Disorders like Bursitis, Tendonitis, Epicondylitis, Ganglion cysts, Tenosynovitis and Trigger finger are all brought about by excessive computer use.
There is also the harm cause by the radioactivity and the electromagnetic fields in the bloody computer, which includes all the ills of the mobile phone.
Then you must consider the muscular and skeletal disorders of the back, legs and neck brought about by improper seating, lack of support et cetera. This actually amounts to so much trouble, that companies have ergonomics counselors...
All this is again, NOT considering the attention deficit disorders, trauma and stress and the psychological and social repercussions of computer/net addiction.

So give a point for every disorder that doing something can bring about - and the tally is:

Smoking: 29
Mobile Phones: 12
Computers: 33

An electromagnetic field from any electronic gadget is harmful to the skin, the cells, and is carcinogenic to some extent. Which means that if you have an iPod, a pocket PC, an mp3 player, a walkman or an electronic watch, or in fact, any such device, it is fucking harmful to you. Let's throw in two points for all of the above. Getting all technology together, the amount of harm cause can be assessed.

Smoking: 29
Technology: 47

Now here is the crux of the argument. Not only is smoking bad for your health - it is bad for the health of technology too. The smoke and the chemicals fuck up circuitry worse than they fuck up human beings. Smoke, is actually protecting you, and in fact, the more you smoke around technology, the safer are you.

Proof is right here, and am going to print and distribute this under the banner "Smoking saves." So, smoking is advocated if you are living in an urban area and in the twenty first century.

Paint it yellow


Rang De Basanti was hyped even more than Mangal Panday, and I couldn't help but wonder if this movie would bomb as spectacularly as Mangal Panday.
I don't think it will. The movie had the audience hooked and hooting and cheering for more - and guess what - the movie managed to tell the Mangal Panday story anyway.
Actually, before I go on to how cool the movie was, it's best to note here that the movie sometimes seemed to try too hard, and the editing was pretty choppy, and it just couldn't pull off the emotional scenes - the theater burst out laughing when Aamir Khaan cries towards the end.
That said, one hell of an attempt man, it was fresh, it was innovative, and it was more often than not, downfuckingright cool.
Basically, what happens is that there are these five guys who act in a documentary about Mangal Panday. The parallels drawn are amazing.
Like there is Aslam (Kunal Kapoor), a Muslim boy who is pretty uncomfortable around Laxman Pandey (Atul Kulkarni), a devout Hindu. There is this scene where Aslam casually sits next to Laxman to eat, and Laxman gets up. Cut to a scene where both are revolutionaries. Laxman asks Aslam to go to Afghanistan and find Muslim support there, who will take him in as one of their own, and Aslam asks Laxman if he is not one of the countrymen. And Laxman hugs Aslam and they run from the brits together.
Basically the Indian Independance struggle is compared to every youth's strugle against the system (They can break your body but not your spirit).
There are some extereme steps, like the main chars imitate the revolutionaries and murder a home minister because of all the (alleged) corruption leading to the MiG accidents.
I go like, what the hell? How can they show the youth that killing the Home Minister is a good thing to do? Is this what the movie is advocating?
And then - the movie shows that doing such a thing will just make martyrs out of these politicians... so they do the next best thing, they spread the word about the politicians after hijacking a radio channel.
The movie intends to motivate the youth to move off their butts and do something about the country - and this it does (at least for as long as you stay inside the theater).

Must watch if you feel like a movie right now. Or else, just buy a pirated DVD at least...

In good faith


No photoshop postaffects, bryce only

Thursday, January 26, 2006

More 3d art

So my Raptors were still hanging around somewhere in Limbo waiting to be rendered. Imported them into Bryce without even using poser to pose it first, and then ot in an old horse that I wanted to render as a unicorn after sticking a cone on its forehead as a horn.
The horse had a better idea of running away from the rapotor, and this came about.



No post editing on photoshop.

Except, I thouht the background was a bit bland and needed a spectacular moonrise or something. then thought of a bear/ape like creature (on the lines of the Lord independant of chaos and law; Arkyn), but like had a brighter idea, and then this came about:



Poser leftovers and Bryce only

3d art - farewell



That's poser then bryce then photoshop.

This is the pic in the pre photoshop phase



Might not look like there is a lot of difference, but there was a lot of chutiyagiri on photoshop before the former pic came about.

Republic Day

So I was having the first cup of tea that I had actually purchased, and this guy with loads of National Flags and those paper wheels in national flag colors passed by. I wondered what the deal was, as I was more or less sure that Independance Day was months away.
Republic Day is suddenly upon me and most of the country is celebrating. National Flags have been stuck in every nook and corner, and I very much doubt that they wont be filling up garbage dumps in various states of tatterment (forgive inventixized words) by day after tomorrow.
So this Pol Science Sir walks into class and asks the class what is meant by a 'Republic'. Almost no one knows. Those who do know don't want the class to think they are showing off - so they don't volunteer for the answers, but these bastards show off anyway by giving each other looks that says the class is stupid. So the Sir tells them, and asks the same question again after a few weeks. Most of the class still doesen't know, the show offs still look at each other, and those few who have listened the last time around, show off by jumping, waving, making weird noises from their palate and otherwise reducing to any means possible to get the professors attention.
On 26th of January, the people of India celebrate Republic Day because India became a republic some fifty six yeas ago. Like presidential rule ever really made any difference in countries with a tiered democratic system.
The billion and climbing people celebrate republic day despite the fact that they don't even fucking vote for the president.

Damn, much more to say, but load shedding round the corner... so will be back with why I am unpatriotic and my justification for it.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Tea

It would be weird to write a post about something basic as tea.

My dear sweet mother did not want me to get addicted to anything - so she kept me away from tea or cofee for a long time. The first time I had tea was at a friend's place when I didn't recognize it as tea, and strictly speaking, it was only iced tea, so I don't think it counts.
The first time I really had tea was at an Udipi restaurant - as a treat from the owner. He just gave it to me assuming I had always drank it, and I sort of drank it because I couldn't refuse him or he would think it was an insult to him. I was concenterating on a prject at that time, so I didn't really get the flavor.
The second time I really drank tea was today, it was also a treat. Damn was it good. Damn did it singe my tongue.
then I took a second glass - and for the record, today is the first day I have actually purchased a glass of tea. Sorts of wakes you up and vitalizes you. Am sure my Mom won't mind me getting addicted to tea now - AND at two bucks a glass, its damn cheap.

Still have to try cofee though.

Bodhi Tree

Kaal se pehele wohi tha...
Kal ke baad wohi rahega...
Jaane kitne sadiyon se...
Le raha woh teri...
Gand me danda re


These are the lyrcis from the Bodhi Tree song "Gaand me Danda". This song is going to become the new "sutta na mila" by 'The Zeest'. Bhodi Tree is one hell of a band, and although the songs are soft and lyrical, they have this funny punch in them that somehow gets you hooked. Shows why you need brains and heart in music. 'Sabka Katega' is another catchy track, just love it the best after 'gaand me danda', has really good Hindi Lyrics. XL ki Kudiyan is one funny song, and although it has stoopid stoopid lyrics, I am sure it will catch on too. These guys need just a mediocre launch to make it really big, but I guess in that case, they'll be known as a pop group which would like somehow ruin the music.

Too many Potatoes is amazingly enough, exactly about there being too many potatoes.

Ragnarok

Ragarok is an MMORPG that was launched in India a little time ago by Level Up! Till recently, you could order the CD for free from www.ragnarok.co.in but now you have to pay a hundred bucks, but that's only on delivery, and some prizes are up for grabs too.

You may be wondering what an MMORPG is – it is an acronym for Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game. Basically, its a very elaborate chatroom, where you have the added benefit of living the lives of your avatars, and killing an endless stream of demons to acquire points and skill levels. The said points and skill levels lets you kill more monsters with greater ease.

It's like playing counter strike on LAN, only you can make do with slower reflexes. You also chat with random people about your age, sex and location, and you almost never come down to any real roleplaying, because that's not something we Indians enjoy – unless you consider an alternative expansion of MMORPG – Massive Men Online Role Playing Girls. See? Exactly like an elaborate chatroom.

Ok, here is the dirt, you choose a character, personalize it exactly like a yahoo! Avatar, and you get thrown into this fantasy world (called Rune Midgard) where you let your character live its life through your keyboard. The cool part is that you meet a lot of people, you live out a few fantasy lives, and once in a while, the people in the game meet up for real life parties. These avatars are pretty cute, and you get to earn money and skill points within the game, gain a profession (anything from a sorcerer to a thief is possible), become a part of a guild (the sorcerers and thieves guilds), and when you get bored, invent spectacular ways to get your character killed. Like Sims, only random people over the net are playing with you, in a fantasy setting. The graphics are pretty cool, especially if you have a comp with good specs, the gameplay is smooth if you have a decent cable connection to the web, and the entire experience is pretty gratifying if you are into fantasy fiction like the worlds of Moorcock or Tolkein.

On the bad side, being in India, the if for good specs, the if for cablenet, and the if for an affinity for fantasy are all pretty big ifs. The investment of resources and energy does not really justify the experience, but it wouldn't be such a bad idea to find a Ragnarok café in the neighborhood (there are quite a few springing up now) and play for a while just for kicks.

Monday, January 23, 2006

Sunday, January 22, 2006

A few offshoots from the previous blog

1) Realised that the portal/engine page could be just a matter of preference
2) In which case, I might have come uo with a better model for the google start page. Imagine this, instead of different sections, there is a drop down box on which area (images, videos, textbooks) you want to search about before the search field.
3) How good will google be as a search engine if it adopts the message board keyword frequency with link idea, if it will be better than Yahoo!
4) What if google.com crawls blogger and indexes weblogs, will it be better than Yahoo!? (Actually, no because the relevency still needs to be taken care of, but it might come back in the competition at least)
5) How do you come to know if people prefer the cluttered interface or not? For the large number of people who come to google and search for random things, the cluttered interface might actually work (no wonder yahoo! indexes blogs then - they are meant to be read when you are bored:) )
6) What if AdSense does NOT scan keywords from your mails, not that I mind, but then a hell lot of people would stop being anti-google. (Would a good strategy involve not divulging the exact method in which AdSense works, which would leave a lot of people wondering, but not thinking it is an intrusion into their privacy).
7) Kotler could have written a MUCH better book

The deal with google

There is a backlog of things to blog about, but this needs to be done RIGHT NOW. Purchased Principles of Management, the book by Philip Kotler and Gary Armstrong, that my Marketing prof has been advocating.
Now, I had a chat with this Marketing prof, and he wouldn't believe that googl'es search relevency was going down and people were shifting from that search engines to other ones. Type in almost anything, and you are bound to come up with some irrelevent porn, the first hit being the correspinding wiki, and the rest being absolute bullshit.
There are many people on this goddamned planet who would worship google, as they seem to think it is the godsent tool for instant school projects and DivX quality hot american girl on girl action.
Fact of the matter is that the Yahoo!, AltaVista and even Ask Jeeves engines are doing a better Job. People might not believe this, but bloggers, try this out. Go to google, and type in words from your previous blogs. You get nada, zilch. Do the same thing in Yahoo! and your blog shows up. What's more, blogspot.com is a service started by google, the company, in fact, started the whole blogging trend (I might add people in India are finally joining the bandwagon, thought it would happen much earlier, but its going on all around me now).
Now Kotler happens to be one of the google worshippers, and the bastard is mistaken. It is not the better ad placement, (the ones at other engines are as good, if not less intrusive to the individual's privacy), but the simple fact that the google search page is not a portal and a simple engine.

When you go to google, you see this:


Nothing to distract you, everything is laid down plain and simple. A striking difference to the yahoo! Portal



The preference is obvious. If Yahoo! just changes the main page to something like Google's, resulting in something similiar to this:



Then, they've had it baby. Seriously, doing something as simple as this will change a lot.

Now, imagine the google.com page to be like this:



Wouldn't this change things?
Its a fully done up google portal, click on the pic, it enlarges. Just don't zoom in, then it becomes kind of obvious because of the mismatch in the different fontsize.

Google is NOT Technologically superior. They might have a deeper crawl, but everyone's getting there, that it really does not make a difference now. All Search engines show up as good hits for the normal searches as does google, and in the more obscure searches, the other engines are more relevent, and there is the fact that Yahoo! crawls google's blogger, when google itself does not.

Google may appear to have a better algorithm to throw up hits - I don't know, but here is a deal, if a less complicated one works as good, is it really worse only because its simpler?
For exammple, Google may look at the number of hits, the number of times the word appears in the page, the proximity of one keyword to another, the number of links to the page from other sites with the key word and even the number of times in the net the key word is hyperlinked to the particular page to decide its pagerank, and hence the order in which pages show up when you search.
Yahoo, on the other hand, may simply (it does NOT do this, this can be a simple idea implemented in all search engines, this is in fact a suggestion) decide the order based on how many times the page is linked to in message boards with the particular keyword. A pretty simple way to ensure that humans are unknowingly a part of the relevency calculation. This is just an illustration, Yahoo! may simply take into consideration the number of hits a day, and still throw up pages in the same order as google.

People are suffering from the inertia of the google boom. It has been the best for a long time, but already, Yahoo! is clearly the better one because of the blog indexing, if not for anything else. Also, the relevency is higher, only those who search in both Yahoo! and Google simultaneously will understand this.

Point being: Google is no longer the best search engine around. Face it.

Mobile phone screenshots

These are from screenshots taken on the mobile phone



Due to some weird NR rules, I acquired a balance of around -48 rupees... don't ask me how this is possible... if you don't have a balance in your account when the caller tunes deductions are around the corner, the balance does not go in the negative. Wonder what will happen if I don't refill till the time beyond my validity after which they reduce the balance to zero... point being, wonder if they will increase the balance amount to zero.



not retry or even try again... its retry again. in fact, they were right, I tried, and I retried and I retried again before the damned networks let me through.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Evolution of patiarchy - and the effects of feminism

Came up with a simple theory about the evolution of patriarchy. This is a contrast the church induced dominance, or the one sanctioned by the Vedas (yeah, they did it) and I now too little about Islam to comment.

Evolution is not always linear. There are many times when there is not one single way out to adjust to the environment. Like membranes against wings for flying, or large lungs and blowholes against gills for staying underwater. Whenever there is an obstacle, or competition, there are different ways to approach the problem.

This is how the genders evolved in the first place. in the beginning, instead of the two gametes of sperm and ovum, there was just a single type of gamete. Picking a random name lets call these cells gamma cells.
Gamma cells are personified to illustrate the point, the decisions were not conscious but were driven by natural selection. A random and slight shift in behavior was exaggerated by the environment...
So, gamma cells are fucking around, creating more gamma cells. What happens is that a gamma cell enters another gamma cell, they fuse, they fertilize, and then the embryo or whatever comes out...
To get the evolutionary edge over other gamma cells, there are two equally practical approaches. Make the gamma cells bigger to provide more nutrition for the offspring... make the gamma cells smaller so that it can find another gamma cell faster than its peers.
The smaller gamma cells became the sperm, and the larger became the ova. Obviously, the sperm started exploiting the larger ova right from the beginning.

Now evolution got more complex, so did people and psychologies started playing a major role. To look at how behavior affects evolution, which many may think is too trivial a force to have any actual impact over evolution - but look at the different behaviors of big cats towards they prey - there are stalkers, sprinters and attackers.
So while there ARE matriarchal societies, where females fuck around with many guys in the tribe, this is what I think happened for the vast majority o the world population, with reference to male dominance.

Females evolved this strategy of sexual crypsis - of hiding when their periods occurred - or when they were fertile. This first promoted monogamy (and then, amazingly enough, adultery)... basically the chick wanted her mate to hang around and pay more attention to their children. The guy wanted to fuck around, but stayed back because he wanted to make sure no one else got to fuck around with his wife (he would have let her roam free if it were not for sexual crypsis).
This lead to the evolution of the patriarchal system. The guys began to wear the proverbial pants in the house. They became physically stronger to protect their mates and provide for them... give them enough incentive to stay. Eventually, brute force was used as the only "incentive."
Come what may, the guy would stick by his chick...

This is mostly because the guy obviously does not want to waste time, energy and other resources over somebody else's kids.

That's why men are so possessive... that's why you guys try to hang out with girls as much as possible... to keep a guard over them and screen potential partners... and THAT'S why girls ask for time out with THEIR friends on their own.

This is all because of the "post liberation" thing. If you look at this in a rational way, and by rational I mean not from the individual's point of view, but to see what's best for the species, feminism was a bad, BAD move. Now that girls get to fuck around without being avoided by guys, and that they can raise kids without the need for financial support from men... thousands of years of evolutionary strategies for the men will go haywire. Not saying this is not good, it is damn near inevitable, but there are major changes heading our way, and we should have the balls to stomach it.

Things are changing like hell due to feminism, God giving brains to chicks was definitely a bad move. Not that anyone would claim that guys have terribly good brains - my theory that brains were a bad move in evolution really is starting to make more sense.

Are feminists, and actually, being a step ahead of what is going to happen, humanists, really saying that fuck us as we are, we can still make babies? Is this a downturn for human evolution? Like will technological advancement in the field of reproduction allow too many specimens of the gene pool to survive that should be weeded out? For example, what about impotent people still being able to reproduce through IVF, resulting in a possible future where more people are impotent, less girls get the sexual pleasure. If the feminist movement fuels the counter-movement of humanity, be careful girls, you might end up in a future without sexual gratification.

Another taboo

I was travelling by local train a few days ago, and in the midst of all the contact numbers for pimps, there was this response to all the pimp numbers penned by someone which read "javani ke liya maa bhen aur lavda kaafi hai" (All you need in your youth is your mother or sister and a dick).

Going to the other end of the spectrum, here is a verse from the vedas quoted in the puranas.

Mathara Mupathya, susara Mupatithe, Puthrartheetha.
Sagamarthi, Napathra loka, nasthee thath.
Saravam paravo vindu ha, dasmath Puthrar tham.
Matharam suransathee Rehathee


Remember these verses and recite it to people heavily into hinduism to piss them off...

Basically means that any union is holy for the sake of the child. Yeah, the logic of the Vedics was that creatng a child is such a holy business that you are allowed to do it with your sister or mother... or anyone actually.

Now incest is bad because it increases the chances of genetic diseases, because it reduced the size of the gene pool of the inbreeding community. This is about the only reason that brother-sister marriages do not exist, except in pedigree families, or families that want to remain pure blood. The ancient egyptial pharoah families indulged in incest, and inbreeding, if not incest, which is only less dangerous but is a step in the same wrong direction, is pretty common amongst Parsis in Bombay.

In Hindu mythology, brother-sister marriages border on the infinite, and were about as common as normal marriages. Pushan and Agni are perhaps the two most famous examples, no point taking any more.

The crux of the matter is that the Vedas promoted incest and did not think of it as a bad thing. Wonder like hell why they were not clever enough to figure out that the chances of disease increased with incest. The vedics were clever enough to discover a lot of things... cannot believe that ALL religions, not only Hinduism, sanctioned Incest. This is slightly scary, as although this happened a long time ago, your attitude towards yourself changes once you consider the possiblity that somewhere down the line, your ancestors had indulged in incest.

Guess the conclusion should take us back to the train.
There was a comeback to the comeback, accompanied by a sketch of a nublie girlie, were the words 'Jhava pan pramane' (fuck, but normally).

Friday, January 20, 2006

Cologne

What the fuck is cologne? I have been given this project to advertise for a cologne brand of my choice, and I went around asking people what exactly cologne was, and I recieved answers basically varying from aftershave to some kind of male perfume to talcum powder. Some were also of the opinion that it was some kind of drink.

If it smells good, it is bound to have alcohol in it. Or it should have oil in the formula which would make it undesirable. Still don't know what the fuck it is.

I guess the consensus is that it is something to get girls to fuck you. Not that I am some anti-metrosexual, guys need to be macho types, but I don't get the deal with cologne. I guess no one uses it, (a significant part of the reason for this is probably because it does not, afterall, magically manage to get girls to fuck you, but what the hell)

Cologne! dude... guess I will just market the province in France and be done with it. Hey! maybe its perfume, we already know the French make good perfume.

I have a little more than words, but the blog cannot take it

Pretty vacant right now... not exactly thinking about anything. Just waiting for something new to turn up. Will probably sit down and wriht that thesis I keep telling everyone that I will write... an indexed and cross referenced answer to the question "what's up?" Hey - an even better idea - I will just toss those who ask me the quesion a newspaper and say "see or yourself."
Won't indulge too much in thinking up answers to random (and standard) questions.

Why?
Just for kicks/why not?

Where?
(Point to an arbitrary place) There

When?
Once upon a time

Who?
A random, sufficiently distant, preferrably diseased, disabled or at least impotent relative of the questioner.

How?
Miraculous / God punishing me

What?
WHAT?

Umm... ok unfortunately I have run out of all the W's and there was only ever one H, so I will bitch about something and go to sleep.

So a friend, Vilas, is heading over to the world's biggest prison - Australia, the land where the beer is free, crocodiles get humped by "hunters" in khaki, "normal" people speak like retarded mumbling bonobos, and the sheep roam around like they are in an insomniac's fantasies.
Unfortunately, this is going to be a significant contribution to the entire brain drain thing. I am going to end up there too... but that's like after BMM. even though retarded khaki wearing hunters booze all day long, can't sleep during the night and fantasize about sheep, Australia does happen to be the third best country in the world (after amazingly enough, Sweden and Norway, not USA and UK), AND Australia happens to have the highest standard of living in the entire fucking world.

Actually, wanna get back to that state of vacantness... walking around like I have no work and pretending I am on vacations when I have major projects looming over me... and here I am fucking enjoying myself.

Hehe... it's funny how many people are fucking enjoying themselves when what they are actually doing is enjoying fucking themselves.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Seminar on Women Empowerment



Or at least that's what I made out of it. Basically, one lady gave us a brief history of feminism, nothing you can't find on the first page of newspapers on 8th March, and the other gave the dirt on the legal system and the provisions for women, nothing you won't be aware of if your cousin happens to be a feminist and a lawyer.

Learnt a few things though - basically the grounds for divorce. The dude speaking didn't cover the IPC, but the crux of the matter is that either one of the spouses can file a case for divorce if he or she can prove the other's adultry. (Moving off at a slight tangent, Adultry is considered sexual intercourse, but I guess, as it is with rape, here too, anal or oral intercourse WILL NOT amount to adultry!). Under the IPC, Adultry is defined in such a way that it is impossible for a woman to commit it. Therefore, while Adultry by a woman is sufficient grounds for divorce in a civil court, it will be a criminal offence only if a man commits it.
Basically, Adultry by a guy is a criminal offence, but not by a woman.

Another thing that the speaker said was that there is some cell established that any female can report abuse to when she is harassed with any connection to this institution. If you are asking why this should be any different from a normal harassment case, then consider this: A music teacher calls a twelve year old girl to his home, gainst her consent to have sex with her under the pretext that it will clear her voice, and then has sex with her.
Here, the guy got off only because the consent of a minor is not valid...

The problem is that the punishment for rape, sexual abuse, and indignity towards women are all seperate offences, and one guy can get away with a lesser offence on a mare technicality (for example the anal rape of a girl child is NOT considered rape by law - only penal intercourse is).

Apart from the above, there are SEPERATE laws for abuse under custody - like in a mental hospitals, orphanages, government schools or jails. It might be outrageous to people to learn that a rape in a police station is not considered a normal rape, but this is actually done to protect the policeman. All of us are humans, and consent might be gained in the police station by the policeman. The woman might consent, and then file a case against the police man as a form of revenge.

There are many more intricasies, and all of them are pretty interesting. To quote the guy (I am going to find out his name) who delivered the seminar, "the law is complicated because the people are complicated". Probably the best thing to say at this point is Justice Krishna's famous statement "unequals cannot be treated as equals."

What really matters is that our college was cool enough to organise such a seminar at all. It even had an interactive session where the students asked questions. Damned good initiative... only wish they had invited students from other colleges as well.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Bestiality in Hinduism



This is a duplicate of a Michaelangelo painting, titled "Leda and the Swan."



And this is from the carvings at Kajuraho.

The idea may be so alien to you that you might not even have noticed the horse being the centre of attraction here.

While Zoophilia is a pretty strong idea in all cultures and religions, it might be shocking for many of us to know that bestiality exists as an accepted practice (Zoophilia being an affinity, Bestiality being the action). The Greek and Norse mythologies are awash with stories of human to animal copulation. Many Gods and Demi-Gods are even born out of these unions. The minotaur of Greek is possibly the most famous example.

Coming to India,

Brace yourself



Nothing half as shocking as yesterday's bestiality picture, or so you might imagine. This is a picture of a daughter, her father - and her groom. Read the BBC story on this girl-dog wedding here.

This is a part of some tantric ritual I guess. Hinduism too, is awash with Bestiality... here is as comprehensive an investigation as I could make it. Here are the things about Hindu Gods that your parents do not tell you about (if you are a Hindu). Not meant to hurt anyone's feelings, just to bring the facts to light.

Brahma was the Hindu creator God. He paralleled Zeus in many respects, including the multicolored sex life. He had an incestous relationship with his daughter (my Mother's explanation being he was the all creator, and had no one else to do it with) but that was perhaps his least sinful act. Some say, because the Gods do not earn Karma, that they are above such acts, and in fact, sin.

Brahma lusted for a she bear he apparently saw in a forest and Jambu Vandan, the bear headed God was born out of this union. Sukini was born out of Oral copulation with a crow, Mandothari from a frog, and his daughter-wife from, of all things, a lotus.

(Of course, to be perfectly fair, we mist also take into consideration the distortion and interference by time, a lotus could simply has survived as an allegory for a vagina - or simply as a word with two meanings with no relation whatsoever, a frog is, in fact, a modern slang for the cunt, but I am pretty sure that the bear is not )


Update: Information from a friend in CBSE; as part of the 12th syllabus they had a poem where Krishna too marries a bear. Apparently he fights with this bear, and bear realises who he is fighting with and offers his daughter's hand in marriage. The bear's name was jambhavata and his daughter jambhavati...

Brahma also copulated with bones - now an affinity towards dead bodies is called Necrophilia, but I don't know if bones are considered necrophilia. Going a step further, Necrozoophilia (unfortunately, these are not words I am inventisizing) is an affinity towards dead animals, and this exists in Hindu mythology, in the very Ramayan.

During King Dasratha's Asvamedha ceremony, King Rama's mother had sex with a horse - which was dead.

Rasyasringa, the Hindu sage was born out of his mother's union with a deer. In fact, many of the sages in Hindu mythology were born out of unions with various animals. The logic behind this is apparently, their births were devine, because normally when any other animal is seeded with human semen, or infact, almost any trans-species insemination, results in the death of the egg. Therefore, since these eggs were sucessfully fertilized in the case of these sages, their births were all considered devine. What is disturbing is that the vedics had enough knowledge - and perhaps expirience to know that inseminating animals of different and various species does not result in a pregnancy. This means that the practice must have been pretty common - if only for experimental purposes.

There are infinite examples of bestiality in the Hindu mythologies, and it is impossible to enlist all of them because of the sheer size of the Vedas, the Puranas, the mythologies, and the Gita.

The point I am trying to make is - without making any moral judgement - simply that bestiality is very much a part of the Indian culture - this might shock a few people, but that is the simple truth.

Monday, January 16, 2006

Smells like teen spirit

During the days of the project submissions, (and more often than not, after the various parties), after everyone stays over somewhere, everyone comes to college smelling of the same perfume.

You know the old Jungle saying "man who smell good have no bath."

Have no idea why the dudes in the Jungle have bad grammar, but the point is that while saying this may seem pretty silly, it is an accurate historical fact, which probably makes it funnier.

Who makes the best perfumes in the world - the French. Connect this to the fact that the Frenchmen have a reputation of bathing only once a year... and now the old Jungle saying does not seem stupid anymore.



The French have a rich history of perfume, and half the class owes this to France. The French also are known to make good wine. Perfume and Alcohol - the flagship industries of France. So much so that they are often mixed up. French perfumes have alcohol, and French alcohol have additives that give them a flavor (60% of the flavor is the smell - eat an onion with your nose blocked by your fingers, and it will taste like an apple).

Will probably go to sleep now, or will have to head over to college after a french bath, and people will ask me whose party I had gone to...

Zoophilia





These are ads from a French AIDS awareness campaign. Caused a stir when they were shown in the classroom today as part of a presentation. When I looked at the pictures, and people were talking about accpetance, I wasn't thinking about the ads.
I was thinking of Xoophilia - a sexual preference for animals. Now the above pictures are manipulated using a computer, so no one will question the ethics.

Brace yourself



That, many will question. They will be grossed out by it - probably even feel like retching. There are others who would be indifferent, some would find it funny, and a select few would get turned on.

Zoophilia has some primitive appeal that cannot be ignored. Although taboo for explicit discussion, overtones of Zoophilia exists everywhere, even in nursery rhymes and fairy tales meant for children. Shocking? How many stories can you remember where a person marries an animal in a fairy tale?

Guess I made my point. The above ads are another example... look at old Vengaboys CDs, full of images of lions and rhinos and other animals fucking each other. Our stories, our literature, our movies are FILLED with covert references.

The Durex Sex Survey did not include a section on Zoophilia, but This site has a pretty detailed survey. People prefer animals from foxes to antelope to dolphins.

Although not accepted, this is the sorry reality. In India, we are not even that open to homosexuality, but we are heading in that direction. However, in the northern states, to use an accurate word "companionship" with dogs is a VERY common thing. Imagine in a country of our size, even if a small percentage of the farmers have sex with their livestock, it will still amount to a large number of people.

Like it or not, people have a sexual preference for animals. Like everything else that we are forced to accept, will we accept Zoophilia too?

Now comes the crux of the argument - trans species organ transplant. May seem like a sudden twist in the tale, but stick (bad pun, by no means intended) with me here. taking a liver from a pig is no big deal now - there is a raging argument about transplanting hearts, kidneys and other such organs. The ethical, moral and social repurcussions are being considered.
There are many people who are born infertile. Their spermatogenesis is flawed and they cannot generate enough sperm. Testicle transplant is a totally possible process. There are two kinds of cells, without going into the scientific details, these are (a) nurse cells that feed the (b) stem cells that make the sperm. As long as you put human (b) cells into any animal's testicals, and transplant them back, humans can generate their own sperm with the testicals of other animals. The byproduct is that some animal sperm will be generated too. Treating the testicles with chemicals and radiation so that they do not produce animal sperm might harm the eventual production of human sperm, so humans are better off having a few animal sperm in them. (Please note: animal sperm cannot fertilize human eggs, if you are worried about that). The technology to do this exists even today... only the ethics are questioned.

The reverse process also exists. Imagine a widow preserving her husband's testicals after his death and using the stem cells in one of her pets - she can concieve his children - through an animal. If she is Zoophilic, she will have real sexual gratification.


Larger point being made, imagine everything we'd have to accept in the future?

Mistakes

Pretty broad term. Donno if I exactly get what the deal is. It is clever to say that mistakes are the building blocks of expirience... but the fact of the matter is that a simple mistake can fuck you up big time and leave you in a terrible mess. To hell with the expirience, you feel like you don't need any of that. Here is the dirt:

Everyone knows everyone makes mistakes (then why are they so bloody fucking hard to forgive?), and more often than not people wish and hope that you mess up, and what's more, relish in the fact that you are messing up. Also, more often than not, you are expected to make mistakes so that you can learn and progress. The mistakes (apparently) don't count, but what counts is how you approach them once they are made. People think accepting your mistakes takes a great deal of courage.

Here, wonder exactly what accepting your mistake means
1) Taking responsibility for your actions
2) Learning from it and moving on, after improving yourself
3) Feeling sorry for what you have done, and try to negate the effects of the mistake
4) Accepting the consequences without question
5) Feel guilty, scold yourself, kick yourself in the posterior end - basically tutor yourself to improve

umm... no point, simply wondering. Figuring out exactly how to deal with a few mistakes I've made.

Blog from anoher cybercafe

Hmm... millenium near College. Just finished with my book review. Could've writen a LOT more, but there was an unfortunate upper limit of four pages or so...

Still made it content heavy and loaded with shit. Pleased with this one.

phew!

Just finished the ppt or the management project tomorrow after finishing the author's review come biography. Middle of the night and having my dinner finally. Like brunch, there should be something like dinner-breakfast for media students. Weird sleeping habits, eating habits, and mood swings.

If I were eight years younger, I would be diagnosed with ADD.

Damn sleepy, might as well get some as I hardly have an hour and a half before I have to wake up again.

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Hello

Hi! I have left this window open at this cybercafe as an expression of my Vanity. This blog does not contain any porn, so do what you have come here to do and head over to www.google.com and get yourself some hadcore action.

Otherwise, you can read this blog and wonder what is the exact psychological disorder I suffer from.

When in Rome...

Actually I am still here to vasool the ten bucks I am going to pay for the half an hour that I am going to spend here. Maybe I am not vasooling my limited time on this planet, but let's not spoil fun by getting all philosophical. Wonder what is more important though - time or money.

Screw all that, I won't be traced in a cyber cafe, may as well join the crowd and feast on some hot american girl on girl action.

You know what, I want to stand out from the crowd so I WON'T do that. Hot american guy on guy on guy on guy action, here I come.

Update: LOL! for the heck of it, I actually searched for Hot American guy on guy on guy on guy action, and I got this.

and of all things, this tech blog.

(Something, I must note, is a blog I read regularly)

look at the changing trends, the first few hits are blogs now. That too for a porn centric search. Blogs ARE changing the net.

Going home and working on the project for sure now. Figured time is more precious than money, whoever said time is money must have been a filthy whore. Also, I am not getting a free show anymore by the guy in the next cubicle looking at filthy whores.

WORKED UNDER B.A.R.C. AS A SOFTWARE DESIGNER FOR TWO PROJECTS.WORKED 0N 8051(MICROCONTROLLER,INTEL) .PRESENTLY WORKING AS AN EMBEDDED SOFTWARE ENG. A

Actually I am in this cybercafe, and as I clicked in the title field, the title for this post and "inspection engineer" showed up. Instead of making up my own title, I simply chose the more interesting of the two.

You might be wondering why I am at this defunct cybercafe where at least two guys around me are staring at some hot american girl on girl action, and I imagine, if only to flatter myself, regularly giving me covetous glances.
Firstly, I have no idea why that would flatter me instead of scaring me, and I too, have no idea what I am doing at this cyber cafe.

I sure as hell did not come here to blog. I came here to work on a project. Now this is a book review come author interview to be submitted tomorrow. BMM projects are mostly done in the last minute. Like yesterday, I submitted this psychology case study worth fifteen marks by working on it for ten minutes. That's like forty seconds per mark. Not that I will score fifteen, but in any case, that's less than a minute for every mark.

I am through a sem and can't help wondering if I am even on my way towards becoming a journalist. Some projects areattempted sincerely, and others are taken right off the net. In fact, maybe I am laready there, as even the papers from the Times Group regularly take off articles from the net.

Now, I cme hereto work on a project and to get some printouts. Printouts here are 22 bucks cheaper than the printouts at Sion, but that cannot be helped now. The printout guy has closed down and only the cybercafe is open. And I am using that like a fool instead of going home and working on it. Maybe I should do that now.

And yeah Traditional day tomorrow. wearing a kurta. If I were Islamic, I wouldn;t be allowed to wear one made of silk...
Donno why I just said that. Donno exactly why I do a lot of things...

1k

Am here. Been mentally preparing for this post for a long time, but as always, will not write what I had planned to write. Thousand posts on this blog -
312483 words later... and I just wanted to ask what I have really achieved...

I basically thought I would post the above sentance, then discontinue this blog. For impact, for effect, for I don't know what. Then I realised I wouldn't achieve anything by stopping either...

If anyone asks me my biggest achievements, I will surely speak of my first thousand frags in quake three. (Quake is a game, and a frag is a kill, a head you know). Not a very impressive achievement I know, but I stuck to the game, and camped my way through all the frags. I started this game with nine hundred and sixty something frags, and suddenly, instead of showing 1000 frags, it shows 1k instead.

I will always remember the expression of awe on a frien'd face, looking at this achievement - that I crossed the game without cheats, and beat the shit out of the toughest quake bot in history - Xaero.

Not as much as an achievement was to get my first 1000 points in snake... terribly time consuming. But I did it. (No cheats exist, but theres a bug in the old 1100 nokia phones that lets you score as many points as you want).

Nyah, no achievemnt... nothing REALLY big. Everything is relative. What matters is not this post, but every single one of the posts that got me till this point. The 1000th post is not an achievement, but the 1000 posts are. I am the sort who starts something then stops midway. This blog has become something inherent to my charachter now. I can stop and not feel a thing, but I will change at a very basic level. I live my life in a way so that I have something interesting and hopefully impressive to blog about in the evening. Have noticed that I have more to write about the more I write... the quality of posts have slowly been improving.

Ah well, I guess since it is the journey that matters, I will carry on.

Exodus

A smaller, more concise version of this article can be found here.



Exodus, the Podar college gaming fest is in its sixth year and going strong. The event was well organized, with hardly any technical glitches, something rare for gaming festivals. All the action was centered around the massive CS (Condition Zero) projection in the middle of the assembly hall, where CS clans battled it out with each other. Established clans from Navi Mumbai to Nashik to Pune had participated. If you don't know what clans are, they are either (A) Five extremely dorky pale skinned "people" who fidget whenever a computer screen is not in front of them, have evolved tactics more complicated than an European football team, and kick butt or ruin the fun of (B) five random buddies who have casually showed up and have to be taught which key to press to fire. There was plenty of action when the type A clans battled it out against the type A clans, but many a times it was an A ruthlessly butchering a B, which the crowd, amazingly enough, seemed to relish even more.
Quite a few people showed up for the NFS Underground 2 event too. AMD had provided their new Sempron chips, which is as yet unused anywhere else, and the difference in the graphics showed. However, True NFS fans were murmuring about the fact that Underground 2 was used instead of Most Wanted.
Exodus was also the platform to launch A3, the new MOMRPG game in India (sort of like Ragnorak) only, not many people showed up to play the game. When I photographed this, the guy, I guess from the A3 asked me to take a few pics and arranged for a good number of people to play the game. But they were mostly his assistants, so here is the engineered picture:



However, it was a loss to those who did not play the game. Playing it for free is a rare opportunity, and an unreleased game at that… The game itself is fucking amazing, bettering anything Ragnorak can do.
The Mobile gaming section also had a grand total of one participant three hours into the festival.



This time round, the festival also has a Car and Bike show, although people were wondering when these would show up. On the second day, the grand opening of the exhibition with one exhibit – something I swear can be passed of as a Honda City jazzed up a bit. No one knew what car it was, but it was sleek and it was red and silver, and more importantly, it blocked the entrance, so people skirted around it with obvious irritation.





The second day of the fest featured rappelling from the main tower. I spent most of the second day of the fest waiting in line to rappel. Some people went over the top after plucking up the courage to do so – its not easy just going over the edge seven stories into the air.









Others took the easy way out and came back down the way they had gone up.



The rappelling, often pronounced as rape-ling in the tower, was organized by the Hiker’s club of Podar.
A few people who went to rappel were given odd jobs like putting up a banner and to remove a plant that was awkwardly growing out of the entrance.
Prizes up for grabs included courses from MAAC worth upto two lakhs, internships at indiagames (the mobile gaming event sponsors), flash drives, mobile phones, et cetera.



There was also this Semperon gaming stall attached with a driving wheel and footpad, and I played my first 3d game. The entire game was rendered anaglyphically, the problem is that the organisers did not provide us with anaglyphic glasses. Anyway, nice to see that a concept I had thought of is already in execution by someone.

Bottomline: A resounding success for the CS or NFS U2 nuts, but only a start in the RPG and mobile gaming department.

Reema Chopra is NOT a whore.

Got a call from a friend at 7:16 asking if I could make it in time for the 7:30 show. A shorter notice than what I got for King Kong, but I was there.



The general quality of the picture has improved drastically in Hindi cinema. The image on screen was pretty crisp, and since this has happened to even low profile releases like Zinda, then it just goes to show how steadily our technology is improving.

The movie started with Bala (Sanjay Dutt) walking around like he had just swam with a bunch of unsatiated Sharks. Knew right then that the movie would lurch into a flashback, and predictably enough, it did.
Meaningless flashback to Bala, Joy (Manjrekar) and Neha (Jaitley) messing around. Neha is Bala’s newlywed wife, and Joy is just this dude who hangs around as a friend to both of them. Now Celina acts like she has just been brought in to auditions for a kid’s role in a toothpaste ad. She is like Sneha Ullal in that totally forgotten flick – only even more childish. Scary thought I know, but cannot be helped. Such things go to prove the existence of the casting couch I guess. A total miscast. Anyone, absolutely anyone else in the industry from Priety Zinta to Kareena to Kajol to Aishwarya Rai would have suited the role better. Celina was outright pathetic, trying to be sweet and failing horribly. Made you remember candy floss gone stale.
Celina was about the only serious mistake in the film. Celina and the assumption that stitching back your wrist together after it has been cut can keep you alive. They should have consulted a doctor on that, but such things are easy to overlook…
So Nisha gets pregnant, runs towards Bala to tell him the good news, and Bala has disappeared.
He wakes up in a cell where he is going to spend 14 years of his life. Nisha dies while Bala is in his cell, murdered by people who have planted evidence at the crime scene to prove that Bala had been there (blood samples, a glass with fingerprints etc has been taken from Bala’s cell). The progress of his 14 years in the cell is shown very nicely, the news of the past 14 years is shown as Bala watches it. One day, without explanation, he is set free to the outside world. Now Sanjay Dutt’s only aim is to find his captor and kill him.
The first half of the movie is full of Sanjay Dutt eating some kind of muffins. In the first half of the first half, Sanjay Dutt is eating the same old thing day after day in his cell, and in the second half of the second half, he is eating the same old thing in every restaurant in Thailand in search of the restaurant that provided the muffins to the cell. He is shown around the city by a taxi driver, Jenny (Lara Dutta).
Love developes between Jenny and Sanjay, while it is painfully obvious that this is going to happen the second Lara shows up on screen, the development of this love could have been depicted in a better manner.
What follows are a few action sequences requisite in every Sanjay Gupta film. Really gory sequences, with sexual overtones play out. The dialogue writer (Kamlesh Pandey) has tried replicate the amazing dialogues in Musafir, Sanjay Gupta’s previous film, but has failed horribly. Like Bala tells this really freaked out mafia dude that he will chop off his hands for laying them on Jenny, and the freaked out dude rolls his tongue and says “phir zhuban bhi kaatna padega” (Then you will have to chop off my tongue too). This was cheap, neither threatening nor dark.
Transpires that Rohit Chopra (John Abraham) has kept him captive for something Bala had done back in his school days. He had convinced his friends that he had fucked Reema Chopra (Rohit’s elder sister), and he was asked to do this on a dare worth fifteen bucks. People started teasing Reema and her brother, and the trauma led to Reema immolating herself.
Rohit’s revenge involved holding Bala captive for fourteen years, and then putting his daughter (from Nisha) up for grabs at this whoremarket where she’d lose her “masumiyat” to the highest bidder. There is a fight sequence between Bala and Rohit, but it is slightly disappointing because Rohit does not fight back, despite all the rude interruptions of Rohit’s training during the Bala-Jenny sex scene.
The other fight sequences though, are well orchestrated. You know these hindi films have the reputation, when the hero fights a bunch of thugs, only one of them attacks at a time. Sanjay fights a bunch of thugs, and mostly only one of them attack at a time, but in this sequence, the body language of the thugs are so good, that you understand exactly why they attack mostly one at a time. The fighting and the bloodshed makes total sense.
Rohit goes to the edge of a highrise and jumps off.



This still never took place in the film, and couldn't have. Bala reaches Rohit when its too late...

Seems that when in a tight spot, Abraham takes the more “dignified” way out by simply committing suicide. Did the same thing in Dhoom. Rohit dies without telling Bala where his daughter’s virginity is being auctioned.
Jenny and Bala set out to find his daughter, and Bala amputates a few limbs on the way. The movie culminates to a very good climax, one of Rohit’s final revenge.
The movie was apparently copied from Oldboy, which is a pretty recent film. No points taken off for the story being a copy, because Zinda was gripping, who cares if it was unoriginal. Not that Torrentino lost any credit for copying Kill Bill (even using the same sets as the original film). Speaking of Kill Bill, those who have seen Kill Bill, and for that matter, any Quentin Torrentino film, would have seen the tributes/influence, but the sword fight in front of the blue lit windows is a direct copy. Even the sword is of the same type.



Like the basketball in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, a hammer has a role in this film. It shows up in the posters, and actually replaces Manjrekar on the site. Instead of Dutt-Abraham-Manjrekar-Dutta-Jaitley, the cast is pictorially depicted as Dutt-Abraham-Hammer-dutta-Jaitley. In some posters, there is only the hammer and nothing else.



A few obvious flaws, but Gupta has bettered Musafir and Kaante with Zinda.

Friday, January 13, 2006

I think this post mainly deals with genitals, but I am not too sure

Our Cosmos, or our life, pretty much the same thing here, has one big flaw. It didn't come with an instruction manual. There should have been an idiot friendly universe, or at least, all of us should have remained idiots.

I sometimes think evolution is not such a great idea afterall. The human race went awry when our brains started getting bigger. We should have all evolved bigger genitals instead, fucked around, reproduced and died. Now what we do is have smaller genitals then what we could have evolved, fuck around and die, only because of the brains, we also happen to worry a lot in between all the fucking around. Worry a lot about the cosmos, small genitals, how better to fuck around, evolution and worst of all - life. Only because of those damned brains, we want to find a deeper motivation in life other than fucking around.

Damn, using my brains too much - guess should get down to some fucking around now.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Mailnation.net

I think I am going to switch over from gmail. Found a better service.

I can now be reached at fucking@mailglobal.net

Mailnation is not in beta testing, and has a much better system than gmail. For those worried about spying, there are no ad sense ads in Mailnation, one big advantage for many. Although it does not allow one to label the mails instead of putting them in folders, that is the only disadvantage, and the feature is not really used by anyone even at gmail. There is another site that gives 30 gigs for free, but that's not the point.

One quircky rule is that mails from yahoo! groups are not allowed. Weird things don't even bounce the mails, they just close your account.

Mailnation allows you to insert pictures and even tables on the fly, without simply having to attach them, you can work them into your mail. A MUCH better editing space than gmail. Mailnation has this outlookish feel, which I think will work for people who have been using e-mail in old fashioned offices for a long time (like my mother).

The best part - obviously kept for the last. One fucking thousand GIGABYTES of FREE space.

No invite required - a free direct signup.

Whatever

Chrnoicler's note: some translation into english is just to illustrate the point, the original conversations didn't even take place in words or thought - but in raw decisions.

The Hangover was bad. Things were a little different in the world of infinite energy. Often it was even difficult to distinguish one thing from another. Dee shook Geodee till he was awake, which didn't take long, and Geodee wished that he didn't have the terrible hangover. Because it was a perfectly natural thing to happen in the realm of infinite energy, the Hangover vanished as if it never were.
Dee and Geodee got along pretty well, although they argued on pretty much everything. Geodee wanted everything nice and orderly, but Dee wanted to explore Arcane and unorthodox areas of thought. He had saught and woken up Geodee to try out another one of his experiments.
Geodee, sensed this, and no one needed to speak. In fact, for an outsider (though it is impossible for one to exist outside the infinite energy realm) it would appear as if diferent facets of the same being - the same cosmos were arguing. The entire conversation was timeless - nothing actually progressed but a lot occured.
"Now what do you want me to do?" asked Geodee, in an exasperated tone, but Dee ignored that. He thought the best way was to praise Geodee a bit. Praising Geodee was according to him, the best way to acquire anything he wanted. "You are the only one who can channelize all this energy, I was wondering if you could capsulate it in a limited form - a realm with restricted energy."
"Are you out of your mind? It has never been done before - imagine how disasterous the consequences can be!"
"Exactly, I want to see it in practice - and what can happen, after all, we exist in an infinity every way you look at it"
"The structure of this realm might change - it could lead to our destruction."
"A Salvation we know we will never be granted"
"Yet, this may be it. Oh well, I will have to agree anyway, I might as well not waste any time."
"Ok. Now?"
"Why not?"
"You mean you can do it?"
"Yes, it is actually a very simple thing"
"Well then, lets see."
And Geodee hesitated. Wondered what to say next. Knew what he had to do.
"Let there be light"
Geodee and Dee looked at what they had done. They marvelled for a brief while.
Dee was the first to speak.
"Oops"
Geodee's only reply was "Well, atleast we are alive."
The observed the creation for some more time. Again, Dee spoke first.
"Notice the way things are falling apart?"
"Yeah, we have found the elusive entropy - something we thought would only exist in theory. Of course things will eventually disintegrate - but it will take a long time. Even a finite fraction of infinity would seem like an infinity. So much so that few would appreciate the difference."
"This is getting boring"
"Let's go get some sleep"
Geodee didn't even bother to give a second look as he walked away.
Dee hesitated alongside the creation. He called out to Geodee and shouted "And what about this?"

"Oh, it can look ater itself."

The Lake

You are left with peanuts
You wrap up the paper
Throw in the garbage
And look into the ripples
A disorted reflection
Stares back at you

You are left with nothing
Not even the peanuts
Or a thought, or a hope
Or even a motivation
The concentric circles
Slowly disappear

New things have bloomed
They surprise, they thrive
All things don't get washed away
It's never upto you
Despite your disturbance
The lake has calmed down

You look down
A perfect reflection
Stares back at you
Throw in the garbage
Ignore the ripples
And appreciate the rest

Afterall,
It's upto you

Sunflower

Not everyday I would let anyone photograph me with a flower... but what the hell, thought I would do something that didn't happen everyday - so I posed.



Only someone stole the flower from me - and I was deflowered.

Idi Amin - King Of Scotland

Before seeing this documentary on Idi Amin on history, I thought he was just this black leader of some obscure country.
Turns out that there was another Hitler alive this century. The pictures of Idi Amin's opened torture chambers were so disgusting that they looked right out of the war pages of a LIFE issue.

this guy was foolish, brutal and so bloody ambitious that he actually lost the dignity of a president because of this. Hitler didn't go around honouring himself with medals for wars in which he has never faught and declaring himself Kings of Countries ruled by other Monarchs.
Idi Amin, thought that he could get away by titling himself the King of Scotland. He probably renamed the kawakai (or some such weird African name for a weird piece of African growth) plant behind his mansion as Scotland.

The Saddest part of the documentary was that the white guy at the end, blamed it all on Amin, when the worst part of the Colonial rule was their legacy of destruction that they left behind - they didn't seem to think they were to blame for anything.

As a parallel, look at the Pakistan-India partition.

Stupid superstition

When things go wrong, and you have no one to blame, you end up blaming it all on God. I used to. Unfortunately, I go about claiming to be an atheist, and am one atleast by principle if by nothing else... actually I believe in an overlooking power wholeheartedly, only sometimes I either doubt the overlooking bit or the power bit. Point being, when problems show up, I don't find it in good taste to blame God for them - and go for another omnipresent if not omnipotent thing - e-mail forwards. Forwards that curse you with bad luck, fear of rabid rabbits attacking your genitelia (would backfire and turn some people on, so they wouldn't forward), guilt for not helping out some some dismembered kid in an obscure country getting a donation per mail, losing your friend circle, and the really cheap ones go for a death in your circle or family.

Although almost no one believes in these -so many forward them to be safe just in case. sort of freaks me out. Forwards and God have this in common - both have a following for no other reason than people who want to make sure nothing can go wrong with their lives. And despite this, when shit eventually does happen, scapegoats (often imaginary) are easily available.

Point here is who really is the scapegoat - the person who worships or the non existent entity that gets worshipped.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Ear Growth

Every now and then, you have this blindind realisation where you comprehend an intricacy of the cosmos you didn't know existed.

I was in a Mumbai Local, listening to a Zeest song, and looking out of the door. The door was blocked by this really old man, and I couldn't help notice that he had really big ears. Wondered how his ears had gotten so big, and recalled that I had read somewhere that the ears continue to grow throughout your life when most other body parts stop growing between the ages eighteen to twenty one.

Wondered why ears continue to grow and other body parts do not - and realised that too. Our capacity to hear decreases with age because the fragile drums lose their capacity to accept sound. The Pinnae grow larger to recieve more sound.

I have no textbook confirming this, but I am pretty sure this is true. As a fallout, if someone is trying to hide their age, you can judge their age looking at their ears. Your ears can reveal your true age. Therefore, ladies, remember to get ear reduction surgeries. Will be funny if that becomes a trend for people like Prmeshwar Godrej. Won't be surprised though.

As a part of evolution however, if old females are not the preferred mate material, then women at least, wouldn't acquire large ear pinnae. Think their usefullness for survival outweighed the lack of it for mate attraction. Probable post their reproductive age anyway. Will have to see if women of the same age as men have smaller ear pinnae - would prove this theory.

Funny how much you can speculate and contemplate on things like ears.

Stealing the Mona Lisa

The Mona Lisa is perhaps the famousest (they said existing words were inadequate to describe it, so I invented one) piece of painted wood in history.

Everyone is even more curious to have a first hand look at the Mona After the Da Vinci Code. Almost everyone on this planet has a theory about her "Enigmatic Smile", Dan Brown says this is because she knows the secret history of the Grail. Other's say that the smile is her reply to her Husband, the wealthy Florentine, Fransesco de Giocondo's question "What did you do with my credit card?"

Stupid smile began all the fuss, when the Mona Lisa became famous (this was before she become the famousest), because those weird art interpreters started a trend of appreciating "feminine mystique". Wonder what that means... have no clue, and am prepared to bet one dirty brown blouse that Leonardo Da Vinci had no clue either.

Anyway, so the painting got famouser (also before the famousest status), and what followed was but natural - it got stolen. Stolen by a suspected accomplice of none other than - get this - another not so rich Italian dude - Pablo Picasso. Thoda jhol hua, the painting was found under someone's bed, God knows what it had to endure (someone also later threw acid on it, but I am NOT implying anything)...

And now it resides behind adequate protection in the Louvre in Paris, as Dan Brown points out in his book.

OR DOES IT?

I stumbled across Da Vinci's masterpiece in the storeroom of a friend's office.



Couldn't control myself. I had to do something about it. The famousest painting was right in front of me. I expirienced what Pablo and his pals must have expirienced... the primal urge to pluck it off the wall and run.



Yes, I degraded to a thief...

And then, I tried to replicate the smile... with a little failure I suppose.



I think Lady Giaconda had probably stolen something... the dirty brown blouse, some peanuts, heck, even the holy grail... does not matter.

Apart from being the famousest painting in history, it is also the most replicated one. should have known that before I turned to felony. In the famous words of the famouser Homer Simpson "Doh!"

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Contenders for GUT

Everyone's on the lookout for GUT - the grand unifaction theory, one simple set of assumptions that can explain everything.
Something many of us wouldn;t have cared to consider is the possibility that this theory is already with us, just waiting for the correct application. When I stumbled across Darwinism, I realised that this was a perfect contender. This is already explained in detail, but think about it. Because of time, everything in the universe evolves. Some continue to exist, some don't, but everything changes. Like "selfish" in Richard Dawkin's The Selfish Gene, anything that survives, acts as though it always had an intention to survive. In animals this may be aconscious motivation, but we can simply apply this to say the continent of Asia, or the Sun or even ideas and notions. There is competition, and the best pulls through. Again, survival of the fittest is slightly misunderstood, but it will explain the point here anyway. Look at the media, look at medicine... this holds true.
There are some flaws though. Some things don't evolve - like the basic laws of physics. Our perception of them might change and mutate, but the laws themselves do not change. It can also not explain non sexually motivated activities, though many would say that such activities do not exist.
There is another elegant theory that can contend to be the GUT. Game Thoery. Incorporates evolution, but is not as simple. There is competition, there is also knowledge of the competition, and knowledge of the other element's psyche to some extent... and so on. Amazingly enough, it seems as if Game Theory is required for explaining the behavior of biological organisms.
Game theory can be put into practice anywhere, and this is already accpeted. Even when you are interacting with your own computer...

will try to see if there are more all-pervading theories.

And oh yeah, I forgot my GUT, actually someone else's (if Forrest Gump is to be followed, then Forrest Gump's), and as I said, it just required the correct application (that's where I come in). It is really simple, it is really elegant, and it really does explain everything - Shit Happens.

Projects done

Was one hell of a ride today. I was still working on the project with one hour to go for the submission deadline, and about as much time required to travel to college. HAve no idea how I managed to do all of that, and unfortunately, my presentation is actually tomorrow instead of today. Actually today now that its tomorrow.

Also there is this celeb interview project submissions today - and I have just finished working on that. Pretty hectic, this BMM. Now I am hungry, so I will eat over something.

Ghe majha Baghle cha was

That's some pick up line in Marathi, and has nothing whatsoever to do with this post. Saw the new Hutch ad - they have followed suit and come out with a 999 forever connected prepaid scheme. AirTel was the first to do this, makes no sense to have the same scheme. Idea's scheme of felxible validity/talktime refilling is the most attractive. If only Hutch did not package talktime along with its validity refills...
Now this 999 scheme, it is working on one principle - the trust that the majority of consumers cannot use the phone for just incoming calls, and outgoing calls or SMS have to be made now and then. This means that they will have to refill regularly. This means that 999 does not make a difference from 499 or come to that matter, even 99.

Get this - the same scheme is launched, instead of a 999 scheme, they have a 99 scheme. There is such a hurry to get this, that Hutch acquires a large customer base. Then Hutch uses the same thing to fallback on for its revenues as the 999 scheme.